An Altered State of Consciousness

...yeah, pretty much this. Helluva party, though. (Helluva fandom!) Himaruya-papa, you spoil us so much!

And I swear that you're secretly watching hetalia, you adorable troll.

...I really wish I had something interesting to write about, but life has been pretty humdrum as of late. I did go to Comic-Con last month and spent too much money, and it was crowded and insane and I loved every minute of it. I didn't take too many pictures because of the aforementioned crowds, and because I am short so most of what I could see was just other people's backs.

I really need to get my apartment straightened up. There's books and and art supplies strewn all over the place, but I hate cleaning.

I've been drawing, but everything is either unfinished or hasn't been good enough for me to post it.

I've also been re-reading some old books and watching too much anime. Season three of Shin-chan... dear gods, how did they get away with half of that? (Not that I'm complaining, mind you. It's hilarious.) Also, the Hetalia movie will be out in November! And the Sailor Moon manga will be in stores next month, and I'm happy because we're finally getting an accurate translation. Now if someone would just get the rights to the anime, preferably with a re-dub, since the version we had back in the 90s sucked. I'm kinda hoping Funimation gets it, because when I start thinking about what actors I'd cast for various roles, I keep thinking of their staff.

At least, that's what I do when I'm not wasting time on the internet. TVTropes, why must you be so addictive? Ditto for Tumblr. And Cracked.

So, yeah... things are pretty uneventful at the moment. Not that that is always a bad thing, mind you. I hear about all the drama my coworkers are dealing with in their lives, or the trouble my nephew is causing by being a rambunctious five year-old (translation: a pain in the ass) and then I come home to my nice quiet, empty apartment and appreciate it all the more.

I am such a moron.

So when I woke up, I glanced at my alarm clock and blearily realized that it read 6:05. Now I normally set my alarm for 5:40 and leave my apartment between 6:00 and 6:15, so upon realizing that I had forgotten to set said alarm, I was sleepily stumbling around while trying to find my scrubs and get ready for work.

The weather has been rather overcast lately (June gloom has been in full effect) and it's that uniformly gray sky that diffuses the light, casts pale, indistinct shadows and doesn't really tell you where the sun is or what time of day it is. I somehow managed to drive in to work without falling asleep at the wheel. When I got to the Radiology department, I was startled to see the other graveyard tech, who was just as astounded to see me and made a comment that she didn't realize I had to work today.

I glanced at the schedule on the wall and said, "It's the 18th, right? Yeah, I'm on for tonight."

"Tonight at 7:00?"

"Yes."

"...it's 7:00 in the morning."

"Wait... what...?"

That's right, I got to work twelve hours early. Like I said, I am a complete moron.

Of course, that explains why I was so tired; I had only been asleep for a few hours. And at least my wish that I could just go home and go back to sleep came true, but still...

I can't believe that I did that.

I've been playing around with my new art software and tablet, and I'm feeling much more confident with it. For a while, I was worried that this program was too advanced for me and that I had bitten off more than I could chew. I've been working with it a lot this past week, and I think things are finally starting to fall into place. In particular, I feel like I'm understanding how to use layers a lot better.

Of course, not knowing much about the layers feature just makes me feel stupid all around. Adobe Photoshop is pretty much the standard program, and it's had that feature for years. However, I always used simpler programs that didn't have them, so I've just never used them before. Also, since most of what I was using it for was fanart that I was doing for fun, and because I had no intentions on doing digital art professionally, I wasn't too concerned that I wasn't using Photoshop.

I do wish that SAI was available for Macs, however. I was watching some walk-though videos on YouTube last week, and it seems like a nice midway point in terms of art programs. Not as complicated as Photoshop (or Corel Painter, which is what I bought), but more advanced than the programs I have used in the past.

So things are coming along. Perhaps not as quickly as I would like, but I'm getting there. I've been experimenting a lot, although I haven't done anything worth saving. I did color a couple of Hetalia sketches by Himaruya, including the one of mochimerica you see as the userpic I'm using for this post. Of course, it's very simple and only took me about 20 minutes to finish, which isn't the same as a original painting, but still... I'm happy with how it came out, and that's what matters, right?

I'm still planning on getting back into some drawing classes, because I know I'm not as competent at the basics of drawing as I should be. Since there isn't anything being offered during the summer semester, I'll have to wait until autumn. I suppose I could just set up some still life arrangements in my apartment, but for whatever reason, I learn better when I have to physically attend a class, rather than doing it on my own (or taking an online class, for that matter).

I still haven't located the cable for my digital camera. But that's mostly because there is construction being done on my apartment building, and I had to get everything that was near the windows away so the workers have room to install new ones and cut holes in the walls for a new ventilation system. This means that my futon is shoved up against the bookcase, and I have to climb over the coffee table to get to my computer desk (it's not a big apartment, in case you didn't figure that part out), and everything else is is in disarray and has been that way for almost two weeks and can't go back to normal for another week or two.

I need to find it before Comic-Con, though, because I want to take a lot of pictures. Well, as many as I'm able to... what with the massive crowds and me being short to begin with, most of what I see is other people's backs. I'd forgotten it was coming up so soon. I guess I won't be cosplaying this year either. One of these day I will. I'm not sure just what character I'd cosplay as now that I think about it. I guess I should decide on that first, eh?

Members of the Klu Klux Clan protest against the Westboro Baptist Church.

...wait, what?

I don't even... I mean...

...

...

Sorry, I think my brain shut down for a minute or two.

It's kind of like watching Emperor Palpatine fight Lord Voldemort. You feel like you should be supporting one side, but since they're both so evil, doing so just makes you feel dirty.

It's a pity that the combined bigotry of both sides wasn't enough to cause all of them to spontaneously combust, though.

...so the world didn't end yesterday.

I'm actually a bit disappointed. I was looking forward to the possibility of a zombie apocalypse.

Now that I think about it, that would have been a great excuse to have a zombie walk. Oh, well, I had to work anyway.

OK... so I told myself a while back that I a) want to post more on this thing, and b) do less bitching about things (my job in particular). However, I think that this warrants an exception to the latter part of said promise.

A bit of information that is relevant: with CT scans, a contrast medium is often used. It can either be drunk orally (PO), or injected intravenously (IV). Depending on what the doctor wants to see on the scan, one, both, or neither might be used. (If appendicitis is suspected, for example, one would ideally use both. When looking for a kidney stone, however, you wouldn't use either.) When an exam calls for IV contrast, part of my job is to make sure that there is nothing contraindicating the use of it. I have to check to see if the patient has any allergies to iodine. If they are 50 or older, I also have to check their creatinine results so that I know that the patient's kidneys are functioning properly. This is because the IV contrast puts a strain on the kidneys. If I were to use IV contrast on a person whose creatinine was too high, it could cause them to go into renal failure (or worse). There are some exceptions to this (i.e. dialysis patients), but it would take me a while to explain them all.

Still with me?

So, early Monday morning, I get an order for a CT with IV contrast on an inpatient. Before I even call the nurse to discuss bringing the patient down for the scan, I always check allergies, creatinine, etcetera. (Having OCD has turned out to be a blessing in this field of work.) The creatinine on this patient was high. Very high. There-is-no-way-in-hell-I'm-using-IV-contrast-on-this-person high.

I called the nurse who was in charge of the patient's care, because sometimes they (or the ordering physician) don't remember to check. Usually in this situation, all I have to do is alert them to the creatinine level and the exam is changed to a non-contrast study. Which is how it should be.

The nurse told me that the doctor was aware of the patient's high creatinine and wanted the study done with IV contrast anyway.

I explained that that was not possible. Even if the doctor wanted it, it is completely against hospital protocol. Which means that, like it or not, I can't do it. I suppose that if the doctor documented in the patient's chart that s/he was aware of the high creatinine, was authorizing me to do the scan with IV contrast anyway, and was willing to take full responsibility for anything that went wrong, I could have done it.

Could have, not would have, mind you.

Given that the patient is in his/her 90s, not in good health, and is DNR (Do Not Resuscitate) and could very easily die if I used IV contrast on him/her... Yeah, I'm not having that on my conscious. Even the nurse couldn't understand why the doctor was doing this. The ordering physician also seemed to be under the impression that we simply needed a radiologist to approve the exam and it could be done. I had to point out that there is no radiologist present during the graveyard shift (and even then, I can't imagine why they would allow said exam to be done).

The nurse was very uncomfortable with the whole situation. There's no way I would consent to inject contrast into that patient. (In general, I am a very easy-going person who does not like confrontation in any form, but I can be a stubborn bitch in some cases, and I don't care if you're a goddamn M.D. and I'm only a technologist. You will not fuck with me in these situations. Write me up. Suspend me without pay. Fire me. Do it. I don't give a shit. I am not doing something that I know could kill a person.)

In the end, the doctor agreed to delay the scan until later in the morning. I made sure to tell the tech who relieved me about the situation and to emphasize that we needed one of the radiologists to talk to the ordering physician about this exam. S/He wasn't listening to me or the nurse, but perhaps another doctor could talk some sense into them.

If you're curious, the exam was eventually done without IV contrast. Still, the fact that this doctor was trying to use IV contrast on this patient at all really, really bothers me. I just... I... I don't even have the words to express how angry this situation made me. If you're a doctor, you're job is to heal and help to the best of your abilities. You don't do this shit. You just don't.

Or you shouldn't, at any rate.

I've come across some pretty lousy doctors over the years, but this one takes the cake. Needless to say, there is a new name on my list of doctors-I-am-not-letting-laying-a-finger-on-me list.

Now, if you'll pardon me, I just had the weekend from hell (the aforementioned incident was not the only bad thing to happen. On Saturday, I worked for 12 hours straight with only five minutes to sit down the entire time, just to give you a hint.) so I'm going to get something to drink and go watch cute, sparkly anime until I feel better again.

I keep meaning to post more often.

The thing is, I live a fairly uneventful life, so there isn't much to write about. I'll pay attention to politics for a bit, but I inevitably come to the conclusion that this country is insane and have to force myself not to bash my head repeatedly against the nearest hard surface.

I do have some good news, though. I recently managed to get upgraded to a part-time employee, which means I'll get health insurance and some paid time off. This, in turn, should help reduce my stress levels, which have been much higher than I'd like.

I also bought a tablet a little while ago. I'm still getting the hang of it, but I can already tell that I'm going to have a lot of fun playing with it. Now if I can just remember where I put the cable to transfer images from my digital camera to my computer... I swear, I'd lose my head if it weren't attached to my neck.

That reminds me, I want to start looking at class schedules at some of the local colleges. I haven't been too happy with either the quantity or the quality of my art for a while, and I think taking some basic art classes will help get me back on track. I also need to brush up on my Spanish. The trouble is finding classes to fit my work schedule. People seem to think that, because I work at night, this should be no problem. After all, I have the whole day free. Until I remind them that I do need to sleep in between shifts.

...and I just realized that it's almost May already. *sigh*

...nh?

I just woke up. I apparently crashed at some point, but given that the tsunami would have hit here about 90 minutes ago, and I'm alive and dry (I live a stone's throw from the ocean), I'm guessing things are OK.

Although the catching-up I've been doing on the situation in Japan... not as good.

It's about 02:45, so, as usual I'm awake. I had been doing some drawing, but had an urge to get online, and...

An 8.9 magnitude earthquake has hit NE Japan, triggering a huge tsunami.

It looks like the tsunami has already reached Taiwan and will get to the Philippines soon (if it hasn't already by the time I finish typing this) and could cause a massive amount of damage all around the pacific islands. I think that they've already started evacuating people in parts of Hawaii.

If that wasn't bad enough, there is a possible radiation leak at Fukushima nuclear power plant.

From what I can tell, I've got a little under six hours before it hits La Jolla, which is just north of me. We are on a lesser tsunami watch, but I'm not too worried at the moment. Still, I don't think I'll be going to sleep any time soon.

There are 15 confirmed deaths in Japan at the moment, but there are hundreds missing. I'm not a religious person, so it seems a bit dishonest to say that my prayers are with people, but my thoughts and my hopes certainly are, for what they're worth.

ETA @ 03:05: Right, found this Twitter account from one of the LJ communities I'm on, which is doing live updates.

Death toll is up to 32, the tsunami missed Taiwan, but should hit the Philippines any time now. Power is on in Tokyo, but phones and mobile internet access is down, which is causing understandable anxiety as people are desperate to contract loved ones. (I would be going insane, especially since I have no land line or cable access, everything is through my cell phone.)

They have managed to shut down four nuclear facilities. I can't say that I've seen any updates on the possible leak at Fukushima. If a massive earthquake and tsunami aren't bad enough on their own, nuclear radiation leak... guh... *shudders*

...right... there's enough people posting and tweeting about this, so I'll shut up now... just... stay safe everyone.